Local Police Now Targeting: Women Removalists

Internet Dating: Do You Want Lies With That?

When I was young it was pretty simple to find a girlfriend. You went to the pub, spotted someone you fancied, bought a jug of beer and yelled unintelligibly at each other over the noise the band was making. Then, if you were lucky, she’d come back to your house for some bongs, you’d have bad sex and then she’d move all her stuff into your place the next day.

Yo, Biatch! Where Do I Pay My Parking Fine?

Tip for job hunters who might want to work for the local council, sorry, I mean “Team Stirling”: Get ink declaring your allegiance to your council and wear a pair of red heels.

Sub-Prime Mortgage Crisis Triggers Sub-Prime Signwriting Crisis

Get rid of your house now! Ask me how!

Local Police Now Targeting: CUBISTS

Roger that VK12, we’ve got a neo-expressionism shopping trip in progress at the Scarborough IGA supermarket.

A Hard (on sales) Rain

 

Dateline Innaloo, from Betty, our retail correspondent

Just 4 months after its “Grand Opening,” Spotlight Innaloo had to close its doors today (Saturday April 5^th), on its busiest weekly trading day, on account of the deluge INSIDE the store.

Reverend Thrown Out Of Supermarket For Refusing To Mate

Thankfully, some people in Perth do try and maintain a decent standard of etiquette. But sadly, old fashioned protocols can sometimes drive our less sophisticated brethren to violence.